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By: Ed Creamer

Look, let’s get real about this thing called Valentines Day. It’s not a “man’s” day. Any given day during March Madness is a man’s day. The Super Bowl is a man’s day. Going to any NASCAR event is a man’s day.

Valentine’s Day is strictly a “woman’s” day. No two ways about it. On that day we’re expected to bring home a dozen red roses, a sampling of jewelry and a vintage bottle of wine. And that’s just the start. Then we throw in dinner at some place that is so dark you can’t read e-mail on your Blackberry.

Why do we have to send all those presents on a day that isn’t marked on any sports calendar? I mean isn’t it enough I gave her John Madden’s latest X-Box football game for Christmas. And on her birthday I gave her those thingies from Victoria’s Secret. And don’t forget I was nice to her mother on Mother’s Day. And, she isn’t even my Mother.

Listen, I’m a good husband even if I wasn’t exactly the pick of the litter. I take out the garbage before the smell gets too strong. I go out and get the newspaper when it’s raining, most of the time? I even sort my clothes on the floor by dark and darker. And, I once even stopped at the store to pick up some of them feminine pads she asked me to pick up. Who knew they came in so many sizes and whatever’s?

Now if you think I’m one of those that still buys my for better or worse a kitchen appliance for Christmas or her birthday, think again. I stopped doing that last year. I even quit buying her the complete NFL package on Cable TV. I buy that for myself. So, I bought her this single carrying case you can put a six pack and a completely cooked rack of ribs in plus chips to carry with us when we go over to my buddy’s house. Now she no longer has to carry two bags plus ice.

But the other day a friend of mine handed me this “all in one exclusive package” offer he saw in a “The Valley Business Journal”. It included a weekend stay at a local resort without the children. Wine, dinner and even a little dancing was listed as part of it. Then, printed near the bottom in itty-bitty letters was this old gambling expression. “Guys, if you play your cards right, you might even get lucky”.

You know, there may be something to this Valentine’s Day stuff after all.